Failure As Blessing in Disguise

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What comes in your mind when you encounter the word "Mathematics"? 

If you're a Math geek, I can see a proud smile on your face. If you're an ordinary person like me, then let's just talk about entertainment. That's how I was with my Math subjects in high school. I tried hard to understand Math when I was in grade school but it's just too difficult for me to do probably because of the head trauma I've experienced when I was 5 years old that almost killed me. There's nobody to teach me at home because everyone's busy with their personal tasks. We cannot afford to hire a tutor too. I got tired and bored of studying hard to make my parents proud.

What to do when you feel like a failure?

I gave up on Mathematics when I was in high school. I started enjoying my life and focusing on extracurricular activities. My grades started to fall and I even got 0 scores on Math quizzes. Thankfully, I found great friends who are brilliant in academics. They helped me recover from my pitfall. Their goodness awarded them with great achievements. They are now successful professionals working on the field they chose.

I graduated in high school without honors but I have many awards. All thanks to my teachers who believed in my talents and to my friends who pushed me to join competitions that they think I'm good at even if I doubt myself.

It was the year 2012 when I moved to a University (Mindanao State University) at Marawi City  (the school of survivors). We call it the school of survivors because Marawi City is known as a chaotic place. It even became a war zone on May 23, 2017. I went to university before the war ended. I did not felt fear as I was in the university listening to the sound of bombs falling and exploding from kilometers away from my room. What I felt was sadness imagining the situation after the war. Then I started praying for those afflicted by that tragedy.

I love my Alma Mater because most of my capabilities were found and honed there. That includes my mathematical ability. As I've said earlier, I gave up on Math subjects, but in college, I have no one to help me do the Math. If I want to graduate, I have to study more than I did when I was in grade school. Many professors in the university specifically in the Math department are called terror. They don't hesitate to give a grade of 5 which means failed. I did not get away from that kind of professor; and because I did not take seriously my Math subjects in high school, I failed my Math 1 (College Algebra) which was actually almost the same with the Algebra in high school. That was the worst moment of my college life. I got a 5 mark on my grade card. My father wants me to shift to become an Accountant, but because of that failure, I was able to choose the course I truly love. That is BSBA Entrepreneurial Marketing (a combination of Entrepreneurship and Marketing), my original course. My majors have pushed me to my limits.

I was once afraid of Math but that failure motivated me to give more effort in studying because if I'll not do that, I might still be in the university trying to find the best course for me.

My course syllabus had higher Maths such as Statistics and Calculus. It had Accounting subjects too which includes Principles of Accounting and Business Finance. The struggle did not stop there because I also have Management subjects which include Quantitative Analysis; and of course my majors with very demanding professors. Research papers, investigatory projects, and business plans are some of the requirements to pass this course. My sleepless nights have at last bore fruits.

I graduated the same time as my batch despite my failure in Math 1. I am thankful for that failure because that was the time I started to think for my future and I seek more knowledge through reading. I changed so much after that failure.   The immature, weak and fearful girl most people know has grown. I am now stronger than ever and have earned a little wisdom, but there are still many things I should learn.

Realization 

My journey to the business world became less challenging because of those experiences I had in my alma mater. The world had been cruel to me but I've coped up, learned and accepted the reality of life.

As long as we are alive, we can all be victims of cruelty in different aspects. It can be cruelty in labor, finance, or relationship. Wherever we go and no matter what we do, we cannot escape from the reality that life in this world becomes tougher as the population increases in concurrence with the advancement of technology. That is probably the main reason why depression and suicide rate is increasing.

My failures taught me lessons that I cultivate in my heart and brain to remain firm no matter what struggles life may throw at me. Everything is all in my mind. I can change the way things are, I can accept negative criticisms with a smile, I can work with the people I hate and I can do more with the power of my mind. That conclusion is based on neuroscience.