An Entrepreneurial Marketing Student's Journey: Her Diary
June - October 2012
Sworn Statement
I will be like a butterfly. It lives by getting nectar from flowers which are also helping the flower to propagate and grow more flowers in different places.
Let me correct the second sentence. It should be “... pollinate and propagate”.
In my situation, I will live in a place and work in a company where my talent and skills will be used to help the company grow and have branches in different places while I’m also saving. As I reach my goals, I will put up my own business and let it grow as how the company I’ve worked for has grown or more than that.
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| 1st year sworn statement & page 1) |
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| The original version (1st year, page 2) |
Freshman (1st Semester)
The first department activity I joined was the meeting of freshmen or newbies. I forgot the exact date of that meeting, but the thing is that I will never forget the people I knew that day because I found my first new friend that month of June 2012.
(Shout out to my very first friend at the department, Kaulani, although we don't speak often (since things changed), I am very glad that I met you, I'm so happy for everything you've accomplished and I pray God will bless you more as you remain kind, pretty, witty and humble. Even though I am not the kind who sticks around physically or even online, my heart keeps on remembering the days we shared stories with laughter and hoping we'll meet again sooner or later. It’s not important when as long as you are happy, fulfilled with what you have right now, and succeed in whatever you are aiming for, that is good for you. Although the chance for you to see this is at 0.00000001%, I still included this here because I’m proud of you.)
The month after the first departmental activity was the JEMA week. This is the biggest event the Department of Entrepreneurial Marketing celebrates annually. I’m not certain of this event’s exact date, but I think it is held every 2nd week of July. The purpose of JEMA Week is to acquaint all freshmen, sophomores, juniors, and seniors in the department; and even the faculty members. The event might be the most unforgettable to me. This was the first (and the only) time I joined a pageant to represent my batchmates. I will never forget the event, not for the reason that many people appreciated and took pictures (like a celebrity) with me that time, but for being so stupid that I have interchanged the use of the pronouns her and his. I never thought that I’ll be very dumb that time. Many people teased me and others corrected me as I was answering. Though it hurts on my part, I considered and understood their reactions because I was like them before. That time, I realized that it was not easy to answer (unfamiliar) questions in front of the public because “tense will conquer intelligence”.
October - April 2012-2013
First Year (2nd Semester)
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No details.
A story that can give a little information about what happened in that semester is >> here <<
First Year (Summer)
No details.
A story that can tell a little about this season is >> here <<
June - October 2013
2nd Year (1st Semester)
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| The original piece (page 1) |
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| The original piece (page 2 & 2nd year, 2nd semester) |
June 3, 2013, was the schedule of the first day of school. I started walking from my apartment to (College of Business Administration and Accountancy) CBAA annex to room 9 at 8:20 a.m. with an anxious feeling. I don’t know the exact reason why I felt that way but maybe it was because it was the first day of school.My classmates and I waited for our instructor for many minutes or maybe it reached an hour of waiting, but he did not appear, so we decided to go home anyway. As I arrived in the apartment where I, my brother, sister, and cousin stayed, I murmured. I was so disappointed that our instructor did not come. Then afterward, my sister told us that the start of classes will begin on June 6, 2013, instead of June 3, 2013.Before June 6 came to date, another piece of information was told by my sister which came from the College of Law. That was about the formal class opening which was finally on June 10, 2013. I got a little bit of frustration after hearing the news. My excitement had gone out and I just looked forward to the first meeting of my batch which will be held on Sunday, June 9, 2013, at 12:30 p.m. at the grandstand.At last! The day I’d been waiting for came. I was excited and a little bit nervous. Excited because I’m going to see my batchmates again in JEMA whom I haven’t seen because of that very long summer vacation. I came a little bit late because I thought that the time set was based on what they call the “Filipino time” setting, but well, I was wrong.
2nd Year (2nd Semester)
No entry again.
It was a hectic semester and even the next year. A glimpse of how it was is written >> here <<
August - December 2015
4th Year (1st Semester)
It was a very 2x long (4-months) vacation, and I got used to it. No pressures and lesser responsibilities. I have enjoyed the life of no classes, only relaxations.I do not want to go back to Mindanao State University (MSU), but this will be my last year of study here in the university (in God’s will) so I have to endure. I have to graduate to become a professional.
January - May 2016
4th Year (2nd Semester)
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| The original writing |
This is my last semester here at MSU (Insha Allah - In God’s will). I’m not very busy this semester because I only have 9 units enrolled. I started becoming lazy again. I don’t have any motivation to continue and finish this semester. All I want to do now is work, earn and save money for my start-up capital, run my restaurant cafe business and make my dreams into reality.I will succeed in all my undertakings with God’s help.
My prayer
Allah (God) I entrust to you my life, family, friends, and all the good people or even those who did bad things but want to change. Please help us and guide us to the right path. You are the only God. Most gracious, most merciful, Almighty.
4 years later…
I am now doubtful if dreams come true.
Will my dreams become a reality?
I was hopeful when 2020 started, but maybe one of these days, my hope will fade. All my life, I keep on convincing myself that this world will be good to me sooner. I always think positive and prevent any negativity from getting in, but I think the pain I’m feeling is going to ruin me again. WORTHLESS. That’s how I describe myself in one word now. An achievement/action-oriented dreamer, that’s how I define myself before. My faith that I can achieve my dreams was very strong until circumstances tore me apart.
The piece of me is hiding in my shell once again and maybe it will remain there until I find my other pieces and feel complete again. I want to be strong and confident, but I just cannot. Fear never left me all my life. I thought I have conquered the past that keeps on haunting me, but as I sleep, most of my dreams are going backward instead of forward (although there are situations at the present that I think are deja vu). My memory of the past is blurry and questionable. There are many events that I’m confused about whether it happened or not and there are many people I forgot. Probably my brain is doing its resetting/reformatting to protect the body it’s controlling.
Today, I am not sure where I should go, what should I do and how should I start anew (or should I just continue what I am doing?). I do not know. My brain is not working well again. Maybe this is because of COVID-19? My faith is weakening because of this pandemic. How can I start new when the people in the outside world are very strict because of this ECQ?
The online world has been my place for many years. It was fine back then because I can still go out if my body and brain are tired of staying home. Then this pandemic came and everything is not what it used to be. I was happy being alone in my room writing my thoughts, but as time went by and COVID-19 kept on threatening human lives, my preference changed. I now fully realize the importance of “building bridges” and not burning them. That was the mistake I made when I began my journey outside the university.
It’s been almost two months that I have not gotten out of this place and I badly want to live at a new pace. But I am fully aware of the consequences of my actions so I will remain obedient and do what is deemed to be the best for this country’s progress and peace.
May God bless all of us and grant us what we need.
May we become united to end COVID.
